Whether you’re afraid of death or not, one thing every person should know is that the process of dying is physically disgusting. You can turn back now… or learn the stuff your mortician doesn’t want you to know.
How Dying Works article:
http://www.howstuffworks.com/diseases-conditions/death-dying/dying.htm
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Music Attribution:
“Money” by Jahzzar
Video Attributions:
Weekend at Bernie’s (2/10) Movie CLIP – Bernie is Dead (1989) HD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gUuOvBQoaHA
Weekend at Bernie’s (3/10) Movie CLIP – Bernie Throws a Party (1989) HD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WvITkVaOpUs
Weekend at Bernie’s (4/10) Movie CLIP – Over the Edge (1989) HD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xd1f5GeUWpg
Weekend at Bernie’s (5/10) Movie CLIP – This Can’t Be Happening (1989) HD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0jSE4K2jH8
Weekend at Bernie’s (7/10) Movie CLIP – Bernie is Buried (1989) HD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3Ubm7iCzuA
Transcript:
First up, yeah, you’re going to lose control of your bladder and bowels. Your muscles will no longer receive energy, so they’ll relax and whatever you last ate is going to slip n’ slide its way out. Likewise, the brain function that keeps your urinary sphincter closed will turn off and you’ll dribble. And as you decompose (more about that later), the buildup of gas will help push anything remaining out as well. You’ll purge all kinds of fluids from your various orifices. This is why some undertakers put incontinence pads on a dead body before placing it in a coffin. In fact the gas buildup is so strong, that after a few weeks its pressure can actually make a dead pregnant woman expel her fetus. This is known as a “coffin birth.”
Another substance your body can produce when you die is called “adipocere,” also known as “grave wax” or “corpse wax.” This stuff is grayish or tan and can be greasy, waxy, soapy, clay-like or even the consistency of a lumpy cottage cheese. It’s made from your decomposing fat as it goes through hydration and then dehydrogenation. This process is called “saponification” and results when a dead body is in oxygen-free, warm and moist, with certain bacteria present. It’s most frequently found on the bodies of women, infants or obese individuals.
If your eyelids aren’t closed when you die, the exposure may lead to a brownish or black strip across the eyeball. This is known as a “tache noir,” or black spot. Eyeballs also deflate upon death, like a basketball with a leak in it. So some medical examiners feel confident that by measuring the “corneal turbidity” of your eyes, they can estimate when you died. To hide this deflation effect for an open casket, funeral homes place eye caps over the flattened eyeball or inject tissue builder into it to fill it back up. Sometimes, embalming fluid on its own is enough to refill your eyeballs back to their normal size.
Another weird fact about your eyes when you’re dead: they no longer reflexively respond to stimulation. In fact, this is one way examiners test to make sure your brain is dead. They hold your eyes open while injecting ice water into your ear canal. The drastic temperature drop will make eyes violently twitch… if you’re alive. It’s called the oculovestibular reflex. I know this doesn’t seem as gross as all the vile substances exiting your dead orifices, but think about it. There’s a decent chance some poor doctor is going to have to pour freezing water into your ear while staring into your cold, lifeless eyes.
Finally we get to the nastiest effect of dying: putrefaction. See while you may be dead, the bacteria that live inside you are not. They start breaking down their host after a few days and create awful smelling gases as they devour you from the inside out. This is what causes your body to bloat so those flattened eyes bulge out of their sockets, the swollen tongue protrudes and all those fluids are forced outward. Your body will change colors as the bacteria feed: first green, then purple and finally black. After a week your skin’s epidermal layer will separate from the dermal layer, so anything touching it can cause it to fall off. On the hands and feet this is known as “degloving” or “stocking slippage.” It’s even worse on bodies with second degree burns, or the ones that have been immersed in water for a long time. Eventually your body will swell so much that it bursts open like a wardrobe malfunction.